2024-10-01 | Cathy Vid Broadening to home

I wish I’d discovered before my 30s what I liked and why

Luckily, I’m discovering now, thanks to these I.U. and Yale researchers who studied 20,000 women.

I consider myself knowledgeable about sex. But I’ve always been skeptical of ‘sex tip’ articles and even books on the topic. When there’s no scientific study as a source, I know not to trust it. And when it comes to sexual pleasure, there had never been actual studies about what feels good — so all the info online and in books has been anecdotal.

That’s what’s so intriguing about the OMGYES project — they partnered with Indiana University School of Medicine and Yale to ask tens of thousands of women about the specific techniques that are pleasurable for them. The biggest findings are presented on OMGYES.com with videos of regular women telling about each thing from their experience.

I only feel comfortable writing this because I now know how normal it is: I’ve always been able to orgasm from laying on my stomach and rubbing really hard against the mattress. Now I have a word for it: ‘broadening.’ It’s been my go-to way to masturbate forever. And I have a vivid memory from when I was young, thinking I’d discovered some kind of magic power and showing my mom, who gave me this look of dread that made me feel ashamed in a way I’d never felt before.

So it was powerful to see a whole chapter of research findings dedicated to this. Not only did the research show my rubbing against the mattress is a normal thing (46% of women do this!) but my feeling of secrecy about it was normal, too (more than 80% of women who do this have never told anyone about it, ever!) Isn’t that mind-blowing?

I’m really excited to share OMGYES with you. Because I don’t want anyone else wasting years of their lives living in fear or shame about something totally normal and missing out on what I’m finally experiencing.